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Pop Culture Mess: A Craving for Chocolate

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SCNN has the pleasure of publishing installments from Fisherking’s memoirs. The elusive writer will be updating us on his quest for the Greatest Story Ever Written. To learn more, visit www.popculturemess.blogspot.com

The applause was deafening, and as I made my way onto the stage I found it necessary to evade the storm of undergarments and roses falling all around me. Several women on the front row were overcome by the emotions brought forth from witnessing first hand my raw and fierce sexuality and had to be carted off to safety. An unscheduled commercial break was ordered when Oprah herself had to be excused so she could change into a fresh pair of panties. I could only chuckle when Stephen King was brought on stage to join me and the thunder died to a much more subdued, polite smattering.

“So, are you two related in any way?” Oprah asked, getting the interview underway.

“No, ma’am,” I said, “My name is only a psuedonym. If my true identity is revealed, the nation could find itself in grave danger. Plus, my parents don’t want to be bothered by paparazzi.”

“Where does the name ‘Fisherking‘ come from?” she asked.

“I studied bass fishing at university. After being drafted number one overall into the professional bass fishing tour, and winning league MVP three straight years, I was forced to retire due to injuries. Plus, I wake up most mornings to a ‘fishy’ smell.”

“Amazing,” she said, “What sort of injuries forced your retirement?”

“I have ‘bass elbow’,” I said.

“Ouch,” she said, and turned to Stephen King, “Tell me, Stephen, what brings you here?”

“Um, well, I was told my book made it into your book club,” Stephen said.

“Ooh, really?” she said, “What’s it about?”

“Oh, you haven’t read it?” he asked, perplexed, “Well, let’s see, it’s really scary. It has Indian burial grounds and

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Labels: Anna Nicole Smith, Britney Spears, Freddy Krueger, Gay, Gay Celebrities, Keith Richards, Oprah Winfrey, Pop Culture Mess, Stephen King, The Cosby Show

Posted on June 17th, 2008

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